Sodomite Hate Crime Hoax Collapses

There is nothing more heroic than inserting objects into an orifice designed for the evacuation of waste matter and causing permanent damage to the tissues within. The sodomite mental defective who must now wear diapers because his rectum has been ravaged beyond repair in the pursuit of perversion is the noblest and bravest of Americans, with the possible exception of the good citizens who mutilate their genitals and, of course, the Light of the World. Buggery is our national sacrament, an act of faith for our State Religion. Every bowel movement that falls out of a prolapsed and bleeding anus is a victory for our sacred freedoms and proof that love wins. Incontinence and AIDS, shit-eating and holes in bathroom stalls, just like a normal non-crazy person, I honestly can't tell the difference.

Incredibly, in current year there are still hate-filled and ignorant bigots who would voice superstitious and baseless objections to the beautiful and loving alternate lifestyle of anal destruction. Well, at least in theory these people exist. The shocking anti-sodomite hate crimes have a bad habit of being exposed as low-effort hoaxes but the important thing is that it could have happened and all of us who have the privilege of using the bathroom without incident should feel very, very guilty. Besides, we're due for a real one, right? Maybe this current whole-cloth account of a hate cake from a deceitful mystery meat will be the one?

Anyone who has paid a visit to the Whole Foods flagship store in Austin, knows the location is the gem in the pricey grocery chain’s organic crown. 

Of course looks are deceiving because lurking in the aisles of this upscale grocery are bitter and hate-filled "homophobes" who are eager to express their fear of the same in the most ham-handed and blatant ways possible.

An openly gay pastor in the city where Whole Foods was founded has filed a lawsuit against the chain, claiming it sold him a cake that read “Love Wins F-g.”

A Cucktian queer in a sodomite church is targeted by the invisible army of evil normals. It's another holohoax, a pink triangle to go with the little yellow star that we'll waste time stitching on your uniform before the electric belting. We need a lot more thought crime laws, obviously.

But commenters on social media wondered why the pastor didn’t immediately notice the anti-gay slur, accusing him of altering the cake, as did Whole Foods, which countersued, claiming that the pastor made “fraudulent” accusations.

Internet detectives who are a lot more skeptical of non-White sodomite victimhood than the endlessly credulous dinosaur media ruin everything. Come on, it's obvious there are raging bigots at the hippie store who attack our power-bottom heroes in clumsy ways that guarantee they'd be caught and harshly punished if it was real.

In a video posted last week, Jordan Brown of Austin’s Church of Open Doors said he ordered a cake from Whole Foods meant to read “Love Wins” — a slogan associated with the movement to legalize same-sex marriage. 

More like the church of the spread cheeks. If your pastor is a mentally defective racial grab-bag that enjoys being penetrated by strangers you might, just might be a member of a cucktian church.

“When I got into my vehicle, I looked inside and saw they had wrote ‘Love Wins F-g’ on it,” Brown said, holding a receipt he said was from the cake. “You can see it nice and clear. Also, it is still in a sealed box. As you see, I have not opened up this box yet.”

LOL. As you can clearly see I didn't tamper with it in any way. That's definitely what the victim of a legitimate "hate crime" would focus on right away. Nothing up my sleeve, the box is sealed, I'll wave my hands and abracadabra! Hate!

"Fag" is in different handwriting and icing...seems legit.

Brown said he contacted Whole Foods to complain and said that an employee was at first “extremely apologetic.” But the employee later called to say that his own employee did not write it, Brown said. Brown was confused — and angry.
The initial groveling before an animal that's much more equal ends when stupid old reality and facts wrecked this attempt to pander to our worst impulses. Can't you just pretend this really happened? So confusing and angering. 

“My question is: Who could have done this?” Brown said. “It’s still inside of a sealed box.” He added: “This is discrimination.”

"It wasn't me doing it, that's for sure!"

Austin’s Kaplan Law Firm, which recently represented a gay couple seeking a marriage license in Hood County, evidently agrees there is cause for action.  

Kaplan? Is that a German name? French? It seems to echo when I say it, which is unusual.

After Whole Foods denied writing the slur on the cake, the suit said, even the offer of a gift card and a replacement cake was off the table.

Wow, even the hope of "gibs me dat" handouts is gone. This is truly a crime against all humanity. 

“Pastor Jordan spent the remainder of the day in tears,” the suit read. “He was and is extremely upset.”

Why settle for a weeping statue when your sodomite kosher pastor can sob like a little girl all day long. 

Mystery meat preacher confronted a hate cake.

It added: “The potential for racial, sexual, religious, and anti-LGBT slurs to be written on personalized cakes is high, and Whole Foods knew or should have known that slurs or harassing messages could be written on cakes and then presented to a customer without any oversight or prior warning.”

Big jew springs into action, eager to rake in the shekels because some gentile allegedly challenged the deranged clown world they created. Truly the potential for hate cakes is higher than ever, a clear and present danger to our g*d-given right to insert light bulbs into our rectums. We must win the bakery wars or the ideal Weimar society we've built is endangered. 

At a news conference, as KXAN reported, Brown said: “Saying f-g is the same as calling me a n—–.”

Well, now we know what the next phony "hate crime" will be from this worthless turd.

Then it announced Tuesday that it is countersuing Jordan and his counsel, as the Statesman newspaper noted. The suit claimed Brown “intentionally, knowingly and falsely accused Whole Foods and its employees of writing the homophobic slur … on a custom made cake that he ordered from WFM’s Lamar Store in Austin.” 

The kosher narrative falls apart, the dream of making geld off of a lying brown animal sags like a heavy load. Or does it explode?

“Mr. Brown admits that he was in sole possession and control of the cake until he posted his video, which showed the UPC label on the bottom and side of the box. “After reviewing our security footage of Mr. Brown, it’s clear that the UPC label was in fact on top of the cake box, not on the side of the package. This is evident as the cashier scans the UPC code on top of the box.”

Physical evidence, the most "races" and "homophobic" type of evidence.

Meanwhile, the Internet wondered why Brown did not see the message when he first picked up the cake.

When something doesn't make sense it's because it's a lie.

“That cake was obviously altered,” the commenter wrote. “As a cake decorator I spotted the covered up ‘purple’ icing immediately, on the original lettering that said ‘LOVE WINS’ The piping on the ADDED ON word ‘F-G’ wasn’t even the same TIP size as the original lettering … He obviously thought media coverage would be in his favor! Probably thought he would get rich and famous!”

You know what? I think you might be right!

A biography on the website of Church Of Open Doors said that Brown, who recently got engaged, moved to Austin in 2013 “with a vision to create a place where all can experience God.”

And by that we mean profound satanic evil and deep spiritual darkness.

Full Story.

Hey sodomite...watcha doin'?!?


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